Why Does It Always Have To Be Me?
by Kari Scarlet
Summary: AU. Seventeen-year-old Lovino and his family have left their homeland Italy, because of various depressing reasons. As a very intelligent student, Lovino is allowed to skip a year and so he gets to know the very passionate Spanish student Antonio. Soon he finds out, how enjoyable school life can be. But destiny tends to ruin everything, when it seems too perfect.. (Spamano)
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.

~Chapter 1~

"Shut up", I coldly responded to his request not even looking at him.

I was sitting at the table in the dining room, holding to my cup of Hot Chocolate and started at it. Actually I'd prefer cappuccino, but I couldn't find anything coffee related in the kitchen. Damn. Thanks to him it's already getting cold. But as if he would care.

"But Lovinoooo… Please hear me out!", he whined with this annoying high-pitched tone.

"No"

"Please?"

"No"

"Please, help me!"

"No"

"Pretty pretty please with sugar on top?"

"Stop it already, Feliciano! No means no! How many times do I have to repeat myself, for fuck's sake! Don't piss me off - oh wait, you already did."

He sighed and dashed to the kitchen. Good, seems like he gave up… already? How strange. But, oh well, better for me, I guess.

Now, back to my hot - which was by now totally cold, eww - chocolate. After I finished it, I folded my arms on the table and lied my head on them. Just for a few minutes, I'm gonna rest and relaxe and enjoy this peaceful momen-

"Loviiii!", Feliciano yelled, before I could even close my eyes.

I sat upright on my chair and glared at him. Tch. I should have known, he'd come back.

"I already told you, I-", but he interrupted me before I could finish my sentence and hold something very close to my face.

"Look at this!"

Instead of yelling at him (what i really should have done, that fucking idiot), i simply pushed him a bit away to inspect, what he was holding. By the look and smell, it was cappuccino.

I gasped, looking at him in surprise.

"T-that...!"

"Yup!" Feliciano nodded and handed me out the cup of what I really needed now. Ah, nobody can describe how much I longed for this.

"But, how?"

He laughed a bit.

"Oh, I'm just lucky, I guess?"

"Hmm...if you say so."

As I took a sip, Feliciano leaned to me and started to poke my face. What the fuck?!

"You know, Lovino…. I helped you, by giving you cappuccino. Because you are my dear brother and brothers help each other out!", he smiled still poking my face.

Ah. Now everything makes sense.

I put the cup on the table and sighed.

"Ok, what do you want?"

Feliciano finally stopped touching my face and looked at me hopefully.

"Does that mean you..?"

"Yea, I'll help you, dammit.", I answered slightly annoyed.

"Yaaay!", he exclaimed while throwing his arms around me.

"Gah!" I wasn't prepared for his sudden 'hug of doom' and the chair tumbled.

We both almost fell to the ground, but I somehow managed to regain balance and pushed him roughly off me.

"Watch it, you idiot!"

"Anyway", he ignored me- that damn bastard- and explained while holding two pants up, " I don't know what to wear. Should I wear these blue expensive ones? Or is it maybe to much and I should better wear the black casual ones? They really are comfortable after all! Or maybe-"

That's it.

I stood up and took one of his pants and threw them away. "What the fuck, Feliciano! Are you freaking girl?! Stop annoying me with unnecessary questions, dammit!"

Feliciano was at first terrified and took a few steps back. Then he sighed. What - now why did he looked so relieved?

"Ve~ You're right! The black pants are really better, than the ones you threw away. Otherwise I would look too stunning for our first day at school!"

I stared at him, my mouth slightly open. He stared back, smiling and all happy and saying 've~' once in a while. I can't remember how long we were just watching each other. When I finally decided to just go back and drink my ( very delicious) cappuccino, we were interrupted by a heartwarming laugh.

"Now, now boys, I hope you are ready, because we have to leave now! By the way, Feli, those pants will look perfect on you. Great decision!"

Feliciano smiled at the elderly man and ran over to him to hug him.

"Thanks, grandpa."

While they were busy hugging each other, I just picked up my school bag and looked up at the clock on the wall.

8:18 AM

This late already? I turned around, just to see, how they were having a conversation. But I interrupted them.

"Let's go then, already!"

~/~/~

"Feliciano and Lovino Vargas" A young man said and looked around the hall.

"Oh, oh! That's us, Lovi! They're calling us!" Feliciano yelled excitedly to me and stood up. "What are you waiting for? Let's get going!"

Before I could complain about, how loud he was, he already took my hand and was pulling me after him.

"So, you are the Vargas brothers, right?", he said not even looking at us, "please come with me to my office. We need to discuss about your current situation." We nodded and followed him.

On our way to the office, I had expected Feliciano to talk to me about how exciting this was and everything, but he didn't. Probably, because he was too distracted by this school.

No wonder. This school is huge, compared to our old one. It has at least five different buildings and the hallways seem to look going on forever. Here and there were some pictures and paintings hanging on the wall and even some sculptures standing around. We could hear some beautiful singing by some students and music which played along the singing. Although the school was very bright and colourful, it was somehow… very depressing and cold in a way. I wonder why?

~/~/~

"So, to sum it up: You both and your grandfather moved here from Italy this summer, because he opened a restaurant up. You decided to live here in this country, because of your Grandfather's work. Is that right?" The man, sitting opposite of us, looked down on his paper.

"Yes! It will be an Italian restaurant, by the way!", Feliciano answered and smiled. I sat next to him and simply nodded.

What else should we be supposed to say? Something like, 'You see, he- no, we lost so many things in Italy and if we would stay in a country which reminds us of these things everyday, we would get depressed. You understand, right?'. No way in hell, that is too personal. And I bet Feliciano would start crying again, if we talk about what happend in Italy, and I would….. well, let's not talk about, what I would have done.

This conversation was way too long. I mean, we have already discussed everything. "Shouldn't we go to our class, already?", I therefore asked.

"Well, Feliciano could go already. But as for you Lovino", he looked at me and readjusted his glasses, "there is one important thing I want to discuss with you."

Feliciano stared at the man, then at me.

"Ve~ but after this we can go right?"

This idiot is fucking impatient, I must say. But I don't doubt him.

"You can go, you know? I mean, you aren't needed here anymore, so it's okay."

"But, Lovi, I don't want-"

"Feli, listen to me", I interrupted him, "as your big brother I say you can go. So go already and make some friends, dammit! I'll see you at home."

He beamed a big smile at me and gave me a small, but nevertheless warm, hug.

"Thank you, Lovi!"

He stood up and walked to the door. Before he left the office, Feliciano turned around one last time and said something in Italian.

"Make sure, you also make really good friends, alright?"

'Friends' he says, huh? I almost snorted with laughter, at that thought.

As if, Feliciano.

~/~/~

As soon as Feliciano left the room, the man started talking.

"Lovino, you are almost one year older than your brother, and could go to the same year as him. However, you can actually go - and we highly recommend you to go - to the last year, a year higher than Feliciano. Your grades are really outstanding, I must say and you shouldn't be worried about not fitting in the class. Students won't even notice you are new, because we have hundreds of new students attending this school. Also, classes are being mixed every year. If you have any problems feel free to talk to our staff. We are always there for you, supporting you throughout your school life, even though you will graduate in one year, if you accept this offer."

At first, I didn't know how to respond. Hell, I even forgot how to talk! I mean, I had the chance to graduate one year earlier than planned! Which means, I will finally not be with my stupid little brother in a class. Just imagine: nobody will compare me with Feliciano. Nobody will call me 'big brother of Feliciano' or 'Feliciano's brother'. No, they will and have to call me by my name, because they won't know I have a brother. This is great! This is…..great, right?

"Lovino? What do you think? Will you accept this offer?", the man said and was probably wondering why the hell, I wasn't saying anything.

"Yes… I will gladly accept your offer.", I answered him honestly.

Of course, I didn't know at that time, how this offer would change my life completely.

-/-/-

So~ this was my very first chapter of this fanfic! I hope you enjoyed it! And sorry if there is anything wrong, my english isn't really good. But I'll learn, I think? I don't know if this rate will go up because of Spamano, but we'll see ^^ anyway, I hope you will continue this story~ see you


	2. Chapter 2

~Chapter 2~

"I really appreciate that you are willing to spend your time on mentoring others, Lovino. " Mr Williams - my tutor - said with a small smile. More like whispered. "All the information you need to know is in the letter, I just gave you. If you have any other questions just ask me, alright?"

After we said goodbye to each other and Mr Williams returned to the staff room, I stared at the letter.

Hm. It says that I'm going to mentor someone from my class. Apparently a boy, whose name is …. Well, that's irrelevant.

~/~/~

"Hey, has anybody done the homework set for today?"

"Aiyaa! We had homework?!"

"I have, like, totally better things to do than homework. Look at my new fabulous dress!"

"Why do you always wear girl clothes..?"

"I'm hungry! Let's go and grab some food!"

"But lesson is about to start..."

"So? Who cares? It's just Music. And I'm too awesome for music! "

"Now, where did I put my frying pan again?"

"No need to worry, 'cause the HERO has arrived!"

"Bloody hell, cut it out! And go back to your class!"

I sighed as I walked through my - way to loud and annoying as fuck - class. They have been so lively the past few days. No, who am I kidding - I mean the past few months. How can they have so much energy? Aren't they never tired or exhausted? And I have to spend a whole year with a bunch of weirdos? Actually it's less than a year since it's almost November. But still, you get the idea.

…Let's see, how it will work out.

Well, at least I'm not being involved with them. It's not like I'm avoiding people. More like, I have no interest in them…. And I'm not really as sociable as Feliciano. I only speak to guys when I have to speak to them. For example during school projects or presentations, which I really hate. Or when I'm flirting around with girls and being all charming and romantic to them.

…So? I happen to like woman but I'm acting cold towards man. Is there anything wrong with that? That's how I roll, one could say. It's a part of me. So either accept it or just shut your mouth.

…But the people in my school are so very strange. Especially those in my class. Almost everybody is originally from another country. A British guy with strange eyebrows, a creepy Russian, a way to loud guy from Denmark, a expressionless Norwegian, a money loving Dutchmen, just to name a few of those weird male students.

And then there are the female students from my class. Most of them are very nice and kind. But of course there are a few exceptions. For example that creepy girl which apparently stalks her brother. Or the girl from Hungary who starts making weird noises and giggles for certain and - luckily - unknown reasons. But almost all the girls are acting differently around me and whispering something to each other or look quickly away whenever I pass by. Isn't that suspicious? That's why, after a few more flirt attempts in the first few weeks of school, I didn't even bother to keep my charming manner around my female classmates.

Anyway, during breaks I often go to the library and read or study there. Sometimes I stay in classroom and use my smartphone (long live the wonderful miracles called Internet, music and headphones!). Lessons are really boring, because nothing was new to me. I already knew most of what we have been studying in school. After my lessons have finished, I often stayed in school or went to the local library.

Probably that's the reason why I have constantly good grades. Even if I have skipped a year now.

But seriously, what's the point of going home when nobody was awaiting you? Grandpa was working till late in his restaurant everyday. Apparently it is a great success, because it rapidly became very popular around this area. But now he has his hands full with this restaurant.

And lately, Feliciano spent more and more time with his new best friends. Some Japanese freak and especially with this German potato bastard. He even stayed often at their place over night. But Feliciano never let them sleep at our house. Fuck, I would kill him if he dares to. And he is well aware of that.

So I was pretty much almost all the time alone. I bet, other's would think I'm really lonely. But don't get me wrong! There is a huuuuge difference between being alone and being lonely. But I won't explain it. Nope. You have a brain, so you should use it every once in a while and think about what I mean, dammit.

Luckily, I always have the window seat at the back row in the classroom. From here I can read in peace or relax. Just a bit, though. Because - as I already said - this class is really loud and fucking annoying.

I leaned forward to open the window and looked outside. The view wasn't something special. There was a class who had just finished running and took a break. Some other students were sitting on the grass, busy with talking or eating. Oh! And wasn't there my brother somewhere behind the trees? What is he doing down there? Suspicious.… Looks like someone is with him. A really tall and buff blonde guy. Oh, must be that potato … why are they both standing so close to each other? Don't tell me he-

"Hey! Look out...!" somebody yelled at me and interrupted me stalk- no, let's call it observing my younger brother.

"Wha-" I immediately turned around and felt something hit me really hard on my head. As I touched it I felt something… squishy? Also it looked red.… Is that blood? That must be blood, it's red after all…. Wait, fuck am I bleeding? Shit, I'm definitely bleeding! Crap, what am I supposed to do? Fuck, what if-

"Mon Dieu, look what you have done…"

"You managed to smash a tomato at him? How awesome! But not as awesome as me!"

"Oh no! I- I'm really honestly sorry!"

Oh. So I'm not bleeding. It's was a tomato. Seems like someone has seriously thrown a tomato on my head. But that doesn't make it much better.

"What the fuck!", I therefore exclaimed as I stood up angrily and grabbed a few pieces of what was once a tomato. Enraged, I walked towards three guys who were staring surprised at me and I stopped in front of them.

Sadly, I needed to look up a bit. Those bastards were all a bit taller than , suddenly I realised who I was confronting. Two of them were well-known troublemakers and often skip lessons.

The German one, standing in the middle of the trio, is the potato bastard's brother - better known as one of Feliciano's best friends. In my opinion, however, he isn't big brother like at all (as if I'm the one to talk, but that's not important right now) being totally immature and getting involved in daily fights. Though he really acts strange around that Hungarian girl. And he acts even more strange around our Austrian music teacher. Apparently someone saw both of them having a serious chat with the principle a few days ago, but that's all I know.

The French student, leaning his arm on the German's shoulder, is a pervert. No really, I'm serious. Just like me and my brother he likes to flirt around and there's nothing wrong with that. But.… his way of flirting is more, how should I put this in words, open I guess? And it looks like he doesn't mind who he is hitting on as long as it's human. Sure, there are many girls (and boys) who fall for him. Nevertheless, he was more than once in trouble, because of his careless and insistent behaviour. Since then he tries holding back, but isn't really successful.

And then there is this Spanish guy. Since I'm in this school I've never ever seen him really sad. He's one of those people who almost never loses their smile no matter what. And seriously his obvious and carefree as fuck. For example is he being constantly molested by that French bastard and doesn't even notice it. Although I often see him hanging around with the other two, he wasn't badly influences by them. Neither has he attracted negative attention.

Until now, that is.

As I finished glaring intensely at them, I stretched out my hand and started snarling. "Okay, who the fuck was that?"

Slowly, the Spaniard stepped forward and raised one hand smiling awkwardly. "It was me… And I'm dreadfully sorry. But I can explain! You see, Gilbert wanted-"

"I don't give a damn about your explanations and excuses!" I interrupted him harshly. "You know, I like tomatoes a lot. But not on my head, dammit!"

Although I shouted at him he doesn't seemed to be bothered by it. Not at all. And if I'm not mistaken, his smile got even broader. The fuck?

"You like tomatoes? Me too! Oh - but wait. Before I start talking about my love for tomatoes, let me get you something to make you clean."

And then he wanted to dash off. But….

"Come right back here, you jerk!" I commanded, but I was being completely ignored.

Tch. If he doesn't want to hear, then he has to feel…

Out of anger, I threw the tomato I was holding in my hand in his direction. And it was flying. It was flying majestically across the classroom towards the exit. And it landed. The Spaniard stopped. But he didn't stopped because I hit him. Nope, I just missed by a few millimetres. He was standing in front of our music teacher and first staring at him. Then all of sudden, he started to laugh.

"¡Dios mío ! Look at your face, Mr Edelstein!"

So the tomato was all over the face of our teacher. Well…. Shit.

~/~/~

"This punishm- I mean, extraordinary detention will make you think about your misbehaviour. You, for being disrespectful and laughing at your teacher;" Mr Edelstein looked down at the Spaniard, who was muttering small excuses.

Then he turned his head to me and continued with a disapproving and stern expression.

"And you for being more disrespectful and throwing a tomato right in my face! I don't know, what has led you to such a behaviour. And to be honest I don't want to know."

"But Sir, as I already tried to explain-" I started but was interrupted by a simple movement of his hand.

"No, I don't want to hear any of your excuses. You won't leave until you've finished cleaning and polishing all these instruments. Tomorrow, I will check what you've done. And if it isn't clean enough you have to do it again. Am I clear?"

"Yes, but-" I once again tried in vain.

"I said: Am. I. Clear?"

Both of us nodded in silence and as soon as Mr Edelstein went, I glared at the Spaniard and he stared back smiling a bit - as always.

"So…. Uhm, hi!" He said after a while.

"Don't fucking 'hi' me as if everything is alright!", I hissed at him in annoyance.

He chuckled a bit. "Not a good start, right?"

"Not at all." I coldly replied and went to the huge amount of instruments lying on the table. This will take us forever, if we won't start now.

"Come here and help me, dammit." I therefore commanded and he eventually did as I said.

~/~/~

After a while of cleaning and silence - but not complete silence, since he was humming a some kind of song, I guess - the Spaniard started to talk. Again.

"So…ehm, hi?"

And here we go again.

"Can you say something else than hi?" I asked annoyed, not even looking at him.

"Sure, nothing easier than that! So how about we try getting to know each other?"

"Not interested" I answered him in all honesty.

"Eh?" He exclaimed disappointed. "But-"

"Listen," I interrupted him, still concentrating on the dusty old instruments "I want to finish this as soon as possible. And I bet you too, right? So just keep quite and continue with your work, you idiot."

He simply nodded. Finally. It seemed like he understood. Or so I thought.

"So, your name is Lovino, right?", he asked me curiously.

Before I started snarling at him again to just 'keep your fucking mouth shut', I just realised what he called me.

I immediately stopped with cleaning and looked at him in surprise. "Wait….what? Did you just call me Lovino? How the fuck, do you know my name, when I don't even know your name?"

The Spaniard's curious expression immediately changed to a happy one. Probably because I was paying attention to him, that bastard.

"It's easy, if everyone in class is talking about you. Especially the girls." He said, in a way, as if it is the most obvious thing in the world. Certainly not obvious to me, though.

"Why? Have I done something wrong?"

He shook his head. "It's just that the girls - and Francis, my French friend - think of you as a prince."

"A … Prince." I repeated in disbelief.

And then he started explaining. "Yup. A charming but unapproachable prince. At first charming because you've been flirting around with them. They thought you've been cool, but still cute in a way. That's why, when you were in sight they started to avoid you, because they didn't want to see you blush - or something like that a friend of mine told me, which I don't understand. But after a while you became unapproachable, as soon as you gave up complementing them. Then they didn't even dare talking to you anymore. Let's just say you have this 'don't-speak-to-me-aura'. Still, that didn't stop them from being crazy about you. To the contrary, they even think you are more cool and hot like this."

….What the hell did he just say? Those weirdos in my class, I will never understand. But somehow that explains their behaviour towards me, I guess.

Quietly, I uttered an 'aha' and just continued with cleaning.

~/~/~

"I'm really sorry for bringing you in trouble and everything. That wasn't really smart of me." He finally said, after about a half an hour of silentness.

I sighed. "Well, it certainly took you a while to apologise."

"Yeah, kind of." He laughed a bit, scratching his head while doing so.

"Does that mean you forgive me?"

"Probably. But…." I hesitated at first but still carried on "only if you are also willing to forgive me." With each word I became quiter. But he heard me nevertheless.

"Forgive you? For what?" He asked, really confused.

I sighed uncomfortably. "For being rude and swearing at you and everything. It's just like a reflex reaction, and even if I'd want to stop being like this, I can't. I seriously can't help it. So… sorry."

"Why are you apologising?"

Didn't he listened to me? "Like I said-"

But I was cut off, before I could explain myself once again.

"Why are you apologising for who you are? Don't do that, please. Listen, everyone has their own unique habits. Some are strange, others are amazing. In my case, I always smile or laugh even in the strangest or most awkward moments. But that's who I am. And you seem to swear a lot. But that's who you are. You shouldn't think, what you're doing is wrong. Don't let people tell you you're wrong. Okay? " He ended his small speech with a reassuring smile.

Wow. That was …

"I - ehm... I don't know what to say." I admitted, but eventually continued in surprisingly calm voice.

"I'm probably wrong, but it seems like you might have, I don't know, experience. Because to say something like that, as if you certainly know what you're talking about..."

The Spaniard looked at me with an unreadable expression.

"Oh, I'm saying it, because I really do." He said nonchalantly while doing his job. "Some things have happened in the past and then I tried to change. Not just my habits but my whole personality. I really couldn't stand myself during that time. But I somehow managed to get a clear head again."

This guy is strange. Totally strange.

"Why the fuck are you telling me all of this?" I therefore wanted to know "I don't know you at all. And you don't know me."

Once again, although he was smiling, he had this expression I couldn't tell.

"That's right. I don't know exactly why but …. Never mind. I just like talking, I guess!" And then he laughed again.

I knew he was lying. He knows the reason but just doesn't want to tell me. I don't understand how he can trust me this easily. Because I don't trust him. Maybe that's because I don't trust anyone. But why should I? As soon as I start liking someone and I think they finally understand me, they betray me or lose interest in me. But most of the time they just use me. It was always like this.

But that's okay. I mean, I barely know him. And I bet, we are not going to talk to each other after this. He will just hang around with his stupid friends and have fun with them. There's no reason to talk to me.

~/~/~

"Finally! We're finished!" He said happily while stretching his arms.

"Yeah… I mean, it just took us fucking two and a half hours."

All of sudden he stopped with what he was doing and looked at me somewhat perplex. "What?"

"I said: it just took us fucking two and a half hours. Problem with that?"

"Oh no" he exclaimed while looking at the clock "I'm going to be too late for my part-time job! I need to go now!"

He quickly grabbed his bag, but then turned his head to me. "It was nice to meet you, Lovino. Once again, I'm sorry for causing you trouble."

After saying that he rushed to the door, but looked at me one last time.

"Ah, before I forget. I haven't introduced myself, have I? My name is Antonio. Anyway I need to hurry, so see you soon!"

And with that he went. I could hear how he was running down the hallways until it became completely quite.

Antonio. That was his name. Wait…. Antonio?

Quickly, I reached out for my bag and searched for a certain letter. As soon as I found it, I carefully read the last part.

- _The student you will be mentoring is Antonio Fernández Carriedo. Probably you know him already, as he attends the same class as you. You will help him out in Maths for the next few months. Both of you will meet tomorrow with your Maths teacher to discuss further information._-

So I will be mentoring him of all persons? For the next few months even? The one who has caused me all the trouble today? I can already see it coming:

How he will just talk and talk and talk about everything but maths. He'll laugh and smile all the time like a fool. And maybe the teachers are going to blame me if he becomes worse in that subject. And I know for sure I won't get along with him.

Damn. Now, why does it have to be me…

-/-/-

Hey there! Uhm… so how are you? It's been a while, right? Ahaha…

Ok, I'm really sorry for not uploading, so please don't hurt me! Anyway, this chapter was a bit longer. I hope you enjoyed it. ^^ And sorry for any language mistakes. But I'm trying my best! See you next time!~


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